This is just a simple list I feel is helpful for people learning how to be a part of a Coven. It's not intended to be a set of rules, but it is a list of suggestions to help make learning to work together with others easier for you as well as the rest of your Coven. More will be added when necessary.

Let's begin with the Dos:

• Do be considerate towards other Coven members.
• Do realize that your Coven members can and often will have different opinions than yours and that theirs are no more or less valid.
• Do realize that everyone has different strengths and weaknesses and that the things others may be good at you may not be and vice-versa.
• Do respect other Coven members' privacy and keep their personal lives and what facts they choose to share with you about themselves to yourself.
• Do treat the Coven tools with respect.
• Do strive towards YOUR highest ideals, instead of trying to compete with others.
• Do take your assignments seriously. They are the tools by which you learn what you need to know to move forward.
• Do respect the property of your Covenmates.
• Do clean up after yourself when visiting the Covenstead.
• Do communicate with your High Priest/ess or other leadership when you have an issue or a problem, instead of letting it boil over.
• Do respect your Coveners' feelings and opinions, even when you don't agree with them.
• Do keep what happens in Circle secret. (Unless of course you truly believe it's wrong, then talk to your High Priest/ess about it and if they won't listen, go to your upline (More on that to come!).
• Do bring Wine, Cakes, Candles, Incense and other Circle supplies from time to time, even when it's not "your turn." It's best to keep a supply on hand of the Ritual supplies you use, so that if someone who has cakes or wine is absent, there's no need to make a mad dash for the store. If your Coven has Coven Dues to cover these items, pay your dues in a timely fashion so that these things can be purchased in advance.
• Do realize that there are more people in the Coven than you. The leadership will not have the time to constantly deal with all of your issues because they also have the issues of the rest of the Coven as well as their own to deal with.
• Do follow your heart and vote with your feet if necessary. You are not stupid and you know the difference between right and wrong. If you feel your Coven is the wrong place for you then the simplest and best thing you can do for yourself is leave the group.

Here are a few of the Don'ts:

• Don't tell people who is in your Coven, what their names are, etc. unless you have permission specifically to talk about that person to that person.
• Don't tell people where your Coven meets, unless you have permission to tell that person.
• Don't speak out on the behalf of your Coven or any of its members unless you are specifically asked to do so.
• Don't treat any new member as if they are less than you. Remember, we were all there once too.
• Don't treat others who are not members of a Coven/Trad/whatever as if they're less than you.
• Don't bring people to any Coven meeting or Circle without permission from the High Priest/ess or other authorized leadership.
• Don't expect your High Priest/ess to explain what it is you're doing to your spouse, partner and/or family. This is your responsibility.
• Don't expect to be Initiated to another degree based on amount of time which has passed or on books you have read or other tangible criteria aside from curricula and best judgement of your Elders. It just doesn't work that way.
• Don't talk trash about other members of your Coven. If you have an issue, sort it out with them. Talking trash will not change anything anyway.
• Don't discuss Coven business with those outside your Coven. Coven business is really just none of their concern.
• Don't treat your fellow Coveners as though you are in competition with them.
• Don't try and re-enact your family issues within your Coven. While we are your family, we did not raise you or interact with you as they did so it is impossible for you to come to a new resolution with us by attempting to slot us into those same roles. Einstein once said that insanity is the act of repeating the same actions yet expecting different results. I think you get my meaning.
• Don't be discouraged if a pathworking/tranceworking/guided meditation/spell etc doesn't work for you the first time you try it. These things take practice in addition to simply "getting used to" and learning to meditate/visualize well does not happen over night. It takes focus and concentration and it will come to you in time if you don't give up.
• Don't use the Coven as your personal self-help group. If you need some advice or have an issue, talk to us and we'll try to help. If you need counseling, please do yourself the favor of seeing a trained psychologist. We have neither the training nor the time to act as Counselors to the whole Coven.
• Don't assume that just because you are accepted for training with the Coven/are Initiated that your friend/partner/spouse will also be. While we wish that was always the case, sometimes it just isn't.
• Don't allow other Coven members (of this or any other Coven) who act high and mighty to make you feel insecure. You are part of your Coven because you want it and the Gods wanted it and we wanted it. So don't allow peoples' prideful natures or personal issues cloud that fact. Have a talk with the leadership about the issue. If you belong to a Coven with attentive leadership, Coveners who act that way will be dealt with soon enough.

I guess that's all for now...more will be added when it becomes necessary.
Blessed Be,
Pandora
High Priestess
Covenant of Winter's End
Kent, England

Risking Dedication written by Judy Harrow (Offsite link, opens in a new window) A MUST see if you intend to dedicate with a Coven.
What is Wicca? written by Pandora, HPs of Winter's End (Editing this)
Witch or Wiccan? written by Pandora, HPs of Winter's End(Editing this)
What is a Coven? written by Pandora, HPs of Winter's End
Coven Member "Do's and Don'ts" written by Pandora, HPs of Winter's End
Life in the Coven written by Talia, HPs of Covenant of the Sacred Well
So you want to be a Gardnerian. YES, We are Alexandrian, but since we feel the same on the the majority of issues presented in this paper by Ed Fitch, we link to it with the hope that you read it. (Link down, will re-link when available. Sorry!)
Wiccan Traditions Glossary Compiled from many sources.
History of Wicca by Julia Phillips (Offsite link, opens in a new window) A must-read for any Wiccan or Seeker.

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